Hi friends!

Yes, I’m still around.

For those of you who have been with me for a while now, you’ve probably noticed how I sometimes go radio silent from time to time – I lose track of time, or I don’t have anything to say, or I move out of state, or find myself overwhelmed by adulting – this recent bout of silence was not actually due to any of those things, surprisingly.

While celebrating my blog’s Tenth Anniversary, I became quite depressed by the state of my writing life. Reflecting on each year and discovering how little progress I was actually making towards my goal of becoming a professional writer, I decided to take a step back (way, way back).

During these last many months, I didn’t have anything to say that didn’t sound trite or like I was just trying to placate my own perceived failures. “Keep reaching for your goal!” or “It’s never too late to dream big!” blah blah blah…every time I sat down to say something to not just inspire all of you, but myself as well, I would just think, “It’s all bullish*t. Where have any of those positivity quotes and bits of inspiration actually gotten me?”

I felt like quite the fraud.

So I avoided this space, a place I had dedicated 10 years to, to get my head back on straight, and it didn’t take long to discover a few things about myself:

1. I want to be a writer. Like really. I’ve been saying it for a while (and I actually do it most of the time), but it still holds true. It’s not just something I want to say I also do because my day job is crap and it’s a way for me to feel better about myself, like, “Hey! I have other aspirations beyond this, random stranger.” It’s how I want to spend my time. I want to be surrounded by creatives with similar goals and passion. I want some camaraderie and vested interest. That’s the circle I want to be a part of, not what I currently have via the day job because I’ve realized…
2. I hate my day job. Like really. It’s easy, mind numbing work, fairly stress-free and I only bring it home to b*tch with The Sis because she works there too. But I loathe going in (so does she, might I add), and am currently off on worker’s comp due to an injury, so there’s that. It’s a mostly friendly environment, I like quite a few of the people I work with, but it’s not a career, nor is it creative or inspiring. Recently, a coworker asked why I worked there. “You’re too smart for this place.” Well thanks! And maybe that’s why I’m unhappy.
3. I dream big (some might say too big. Me. I’m the one saying that.), but need to scale back the annual goal setting because I set myself up for failure each year because I want to do too many things all the time. I have too many interests. Too many goals. As I was writing down my list for the new year, I wrote that I wanted to write a novel, in addition to rewriting almost all of my scripts, creating a show bible, my reading/movie watching goals, building a website, researching my ancestry, playing the library of video games each waiting for their turn, relearning the piano, and continuing to learn French, while eating better, getting well so I can get back to yoga, doing more with The Sis and the puppers…I mean, c’mon. I’m out of control. Oh, and I have a Big Birthday coming up in less than 2 months, so there’s some planning required for that milestone.

((deep sigh))

I need a time manager.

I know I will never watch all the movies I want. I know I will never play all the games. Or read all the books. Or see all the sights in person. I may never even rewrite some of my own work. I have to learn to live with this, and for the most part I have, I just sometimes wish that the days were longer, or I was faster at doing some things to maybe make a bigger dent, but whatever, this is who I am.

So, you may be wondering, “What did she do this year instead of coming here?”

Well, I made, and exceeded, my reading goal. Favorite books this year were All Systems Red by Martha Wells (I’m obsessed with the Murderbot series) and Eye of the Needle by Ken Follett. So so good.

I made, and exceeded, my movie watching goal. Some of my favorites this year were the French sci-fi Vesper which needs its own series to expand upon, TMNT: Mutant Mayhem was adorable, Godzilla Minus One surprised me, and of course, Deadpool and Wolverine. It’s just a good time.

There was some great tv this year. Fallout was tops for me. Just good from start to finish, even if you haven’t played any of the games, it’s accessible. Arcane S2 was great, but I think season one was better. I discovered a different kind of superhero story in the British series, Extraordinary, and a hilarious Australian comedy from 20 years ago called Kath & Kim.

I’ve nearly finished writing a new screenplay, tentatively titled, Man of Sin. (Yes, I’ve been playing with a poster creator.) I’ll talk more about this later. This is the story that I think needs to become a novel. It’s taken on a life of its own, the characters are so cute together, and it’s currently sitting at 137 pages with no end in the direct vicinity. I’m hoping to have the first draft finished by new year. I also started a new chapter of my Dragon Age fanfic.

I’m almost finished with my first playthrough of Baldur’s Gate 3 which may have turned my head to become the best game I’ve ever played. Yes, it is that good. I’ll write about it next year, when I’m officially done. It’s going into the new tattoo. So yeah, you know I like it.

The Sis and I attended San Diego Comic-Con again this year.

And we had to come to terms with the death of our estranged father. That was…a strange time.

So that’s a peek into what I’ve been up to this year, and now it’s coming to a close. I can’t believe 2024 is at its end. It gets a little faster every year.

So, if you’ve made it this far, I just wanted to say, Thank You! for sticking with me these past 10 years and for being a wonderful community of the kind of people I want to surround myself with. I’m still not 100% sure of how I want to proceed here, I have a few changes in mind, but I hope you’ll stay for the journey.

I wish you all well, my friends! Stay weird and creative and inspiring, and hopefully 2025 will prove a fruitful year.

Happy New Year!!

xx, Rach