Discrepant Writer Update

Posted in Posts by Rachael C Marek

It’s official.

We are California residents…once more.

After yet another stressful move, we’ve landed and are trying to return to normal. I barely slept for weeks and it took days upon days to feel like myself again. I’m still not sure I’m there yet.

And we’re not done yet – a hiccup in the apartment application process has left us in limbo. Thankfully, we have family here. So all our stuff is in storage, which means we’ll have to load up a truck again. I’m sure you can imagine our delight at that prospect.

So here I sit, a little over a week after a big move trying to find my groove with a mild sense of worry that it’s going to take a bit longer to get to that “vibe” I’m hoping for. The lack of routine and normalcy for over a month has left my creative side on a back burner, another reason I don’t feel like myself, but it was interesting, I caught myself at strange times thinking about my stories.

While loading up the truck, just The Sis and I, we would make off-handed comments about what we could get rid of or how it might feel if we lost everything. It brought me back to my pilot and how I had first become inspired to write the story.

While driving through Oregon, there was this beautiful green, lush landscape that immediately made me think of the protagonist in my fan fiction (I know!) and her journey.

I felt the compulsion to write something, anything at random times, knowing full well I didn’t have time, and regretted it.

And now here I sit.

A change of venue and little else, but a bit closer to the end result I’m hoping for. I’m back in L.A. The people I meet and interact with may be “that” person, the one that helps me become a professional writer. It’s one of the reasons we moved back, and with a little patience and endurance for the next couple of weeks ahead of us, it will hopefully all start to make sense.

So how are all of you? Any big or small news you want to inspire us with? Have a little Monday Motivation to share with the class?

((sigh)) It feels good to be back!

Happy Writing!

10Jan2023

The Problem with The Witcher (TV)

Posted in Posts, Reviews by Rachael C Marek

When news that Henry Cavill would be leaving The Witcher by season 4, I had to wonder what had happened to make an actor, who had fought hard for the role of Geralt, quit?

The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt video game is still among the best I’ve played. I wrote a review about it a while back, so you can imagine my skepticism when I initially heard a show was in the works. I’ve read all the books too, but that’s a story for another day. Who could possibly fill Geralt’s shoes? Henry Cavill? That pretty boy? Eh…and then I heard his passion for the character and the story.

Okay. I’ll give him a shot.

And he is by far the best part of the show, because there is quite a bit wrong about it.

So forewarning, I had a lot more to say on this subject than I originally thought I would, so this is a doozy, and I think I could have said more, so…settle in.

When the show was in development, creator Lauren Schmidt Hissrich was making the rounds and I remember hearing her say that the writers’ room would be a mix of people who were fans of the games and/or books, and those who may not be familiar in order to add a different perspective.

With Cavill’s departure, tales of what was actually happening behind the scenes started to come to light. The gossip – none of the writers are any level of fan of the original works. Whether it’s true or not is beside the point because watching the show, as a fan, makes it clear that things were amiss.

Season 1 was hard to follow. The time jumps were confusing, as was the whole set up. I liked Season 2 more, but after I wrote about it, which was literally a line about how it was better than the first season, I became more bothered by some of the ideas presented.

For those of you unfamiliar with The Witcher, the story revolves around the relationship between Geralt, a monster slayer from an old order that serves to protect, and Ciri, a princess who is bound to him by destiny through a quirky old world payment system. I was trying to think of a nice way to say this without spoiling too much for those of you still wanting to read, play, or watch. Yennefer, Triss, and Dandelion aka Jaskier are all integral to the story because of their relationships with the other two, and they all have to traverse a land fraught with war, witch hunts, exiled elves hoping to reclaim their lost territory, monsters, and more.

With so much material to draw from in order to create a lush world full of interesting characters and stories, how did the show go wrong?

So, if the writers room is truly filled with people unfamiliar with the world, that would be square one. Not having an understanding of the large stage that The Witcher moves about is a big problem, and it shows. Game of Thrones is still one of the best shows I ever watched, I just ignore that dreadful final season, but those are BIG books, with tons of history and loads of characters to follow but the introduction to that world, the politics, the looming threat, and so much more were presented pretty spectacularly in the first episode.

This is the template The Witcher tv writers should have followed, to some degree. Geralt is at the center of a great deal, or so he should have been presented.

Not understanding the relationships that develop with all these characters is square two. We learn that Ciri is powerful, but that’s not why Geralt is protecting her. In time, they develop a father-daughter relationship, and that detail is Geralt’s primary motivator. Yennefer, who is barren, takes on the maternal role and loves Ciri like her own. Triss becomes her sister. It is these bonds that drive them to action. Yennefer, for all her bluster, wouldn’t do anything to put Ciri in danger, or do anything that would purposefully hurt Geralt, and actions taken in Season 2 of the show go against this basic premise.

In GoT we follow the Stark family as they move about and this is how we learn about relationships, history, and the plot. While we need context for some of The Witcher’s setup, starting so far back, before any of these characters know one another, divides attention away from everything else.

Let’s round the problems to three. Square number three would be in regards to not highlighting the threats, of which there are many, earlier on. There are the immediate threats, like war and witch hunting, but the greater threat is the Wild Hunt. Like the White Walkers, they are coming, and it should have always been on the peripheral because they are a ticking time bomb.

The reason I chose Game of Thrones for the comparison is because it was a massive success. I am not asking The Witcher to be that, but to emulate the delivery of so much information in a better way. Besides, we’re all looking for the next big thing to be addicted to, and unfortunately, given the circumstances, it’s not going to be this. The fantasy trope is widely established, so much of that setup can be sidestepped, but utilizing the characters differently, to impart the happenings of the world at large, should have been better executed.

Some ideas could have been told in flashback, or just mentioned in conversation to lose all that back and forth in Season 1. In the books, there are repeated references to events unseen, and that could have happened for a number of scenes in the show. We don’t need to see everything to understand what happened and how it affected the characters or the world.

I had high hopes for The Witcher. I think a lot of us did. As I’ve learned, it takes so many lucky breaks to get something made, and it’s disappointing when it just doesn’t work. And if it ends up being true that the writers didn’t care for the material, then not only will that upset fans, like me, it makes me question why they bothered. Writers in Hollywood have a tough enough gig, but with so many opportunities now, I would hope that they would at least want to work on something they like. I know that sounds a bit naive, but I write in certain genres, and would not take a job on a show I wouldn’t watch.

I do not watch procedurals, and even something like Lucifer bored me at times. I actually stopped watching it for a while. I don’t like the solve the case by the end of the show setup, so I would despise working on something like that. Personally. It wouldn’t be satisfying, and while I may need the work, need the credit, etc. I don’t want to find myself unhappy doing the thing that brings me joy. I guess we’ll find out if that holds true.

So what do you think of The Witcher? Do you agree or disagree with how it was presented? Do you have any ideas of how you would have done it differently? Share your thoughts below!

5Jan2023

First Quote of 2023

Posted in Posts, Quotes by Rachael C Marek

Happy New Year!

I wanted to find a quote that really sets the tone for the year I want us all to have. This is by no means a judgement on anyone other than myself, but I want all of us to be able to create the life we want.

I’ve always been surprised by the concept of how little things seem to change over the course of a year, but looking back how different things sometimes are. This is why this quote resonated with me.

I’m of a certain age now where I’ve come to an understanding of a few things:

I’m more comfortable with myself and who I am, like I’m not wildly embarrassed to admit I write fan fiction anymore. ((wince))
I’m not as hard on myself.
I take better care of myself. Thank you yoga!
And biggest improvement, I’m learning to love myself. I take a moment during yoga to thank myself for showing up. It usually makes me giggle, but so often it’s easier not to show up. It’s a small step, I am still learning, but since we’re stuck with ourselves we should be nicer.

The Sis has helped me to be brave. Maybe because she’s the youngest, she developed this strong sense of self. She’s self-aware in a way that’s taken me years to become. I still don’t think I’m there. It’s all part of the evolution of becoming who we’re supposed to be.

Where I need the help is in the discipline arena.

With the gray days of winter, I oversleep. I feel the seasonal depression. I’m way off my routine, and I seem uninspired to do anything about it, but if I want to be in the right position to take on Hollywood in a few months, I have to get in gear, and now. I was going strong for a while, but upon the completion of a couple of projects, I lost motivation. Currently it still feels like a void, and because of this I allow myself to become distracted, and days go by…like this post. I started it on Monday. ((insert eye roll))

I need more discipline.

So that is at the top of my To Do List for this year.

What are you hoping to accomplish this year? What strides did you make looking back on 2022? Remember, each day can be a new beginning. Little steps lead to great strides. And who knows, in a year you could be exactly where you want to be.

Best wishes!

xx, Rach

19Dec2022

My First Annual Best of List

Posted in Posts, Reviews by Rachael C Marek

2022’s Best of Review

Every year I set for myself a number of goals – reading, writing, and watching among them, and I thought, why not share the best of what entertained me this past year.

I am almost always behind the times. I am rarely current on anything, but I figured some of you may be like me and want to know what might still be worth the effort, so I’ve compiled my first “best of” list.

Taking note of the books, graphic novels, tv, films, and video games I enjoyed this year, I realized not all categories had a love option, but there were definitely some standouts.

Books & Graphic Novels

I use Goodreads to keep track of my reading goal, in addition to ratings and what else I’d like to read…eventually. They use a five-star rating system and not one book I read this year received such high marks, although I did have two books that tied with four – The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. I’ve included the links to my reviews, if you’re interested. Each are unique in their own way, as is the artwork of Harleen by Stjepan Šejić, my top graphic novel of the year, which, too, earned four stars. Although, it really is a piece of eye candy.

Television

I watched a great deal more television than I anticipated, and I still feel Arcane by Netflix based on the game, League of Legends by Riot Games is the best thing I watched. The story, the characters, and the style are all top notch. This may lead you to wonder then at how a reality show made it on my list.

RuPaul’s Drag Race is one of my favorite things ever, and The Sis and I are longtime fans. All Stars Season 7 was a unique experience in which the cast were all returning winners vying for a chance to be called the Queen of All Queens. Not only was this one of the best shows I watched all year, the cast is stellar, but also this is probably my favorite season of the show of all time.

Movies

I made my movie watching goal and then some. Yay for keeping expectations low(er). My viewings this year were a mix of past and current films, those in my genre, and some just because. While most were middle of the road, disappointing, and/or forgettable, Christopher Nolan’s Interstellar was never going to be counted among those. No surprise there. The surprise was liking it as much as I did. If you’re late to the party, like I usually am, this is definitely still worth the watch. Runner up, Free Guy. I know, it surprised me too.

Video Games

Yes, I invested in the Legendary Edition of Mass Effect. Did I already have the trilogy? Yep. Does EA need more of my money? Sigh. When Dragon Age: Dreadwolf comes out will they get more? You’d better believe it. Mass Effect 2 is still one the best games I’ve played, and the Legendary Edition only made everything better. Streamlined graphics, all the DLCs save one, and it is still a great time. This playthrough I tried my hand at being a Renegade male Shepard who romanced Tali and made some difficult decisions. That’s the fun of this series, there are so many options to explore, and that’s why we keep coming back, no matter what you may think of the ending. 😉

~ * ~

So, there we have it.

There are so many more books, shows, movies, and games to enjoy, so you can imagine how my new year’s lists are already bursting, but I’d be delighted to hear what you enjoyed most this past year. Please share your recommendations!

14Sep2022

Quote of the Week

Posted in Posts, Quotes by Rachael C Marek

Nearly a month ago, I started to feel it.

The whisper. The tickle at the back of my mind.

The dreaded creativity cursed fear –

Burnout.

At least that’s what I think it is.

As I neared the completion of the first rewrite on my latest screenplay, I could feel my desire to continue waning. I was enjoying the rewrite, didn’t really have an idea of what I was going to do next, despite the plan I had in place in order to be prepared for the move back to LA, and so here I am. I think I mentioned the “fear” in a post, so perhaps I manifested it. Well, if my mind is capable of that, perhaps it could make some other things happen instead.

Even before I felt a bit aimless…lethargic…bored. Still sort of do.

I haven’t been compelled to do much of anything – not yoga, not gaming, not movie watching – just the bare minimum to get by.

So I’ve taken a break in the hopes I can refocus and find my center.

I’m not 100%, but I can feel myself returning to my normal, slowly. I even had the stirrings of a new idea, so…

Being a writer isn’t for everyone. It is not easy, as some may think. It’s not for the faint of heart, or those without the passion to carry them through the rough patches. It may sound a bit dramatic, but it’s true. While I want to be encouraging to those who already are writers, because we all get it, I’m not sure how apt I am to encourage someone who may only be “interested” to pursue this path.

Okay, that’s not true. You all know I’ve had multiple encouraging conversations with hopeful writers.

It takes a lot of years to see results. We spend an inordinate amount of time alone, doubting ourselves, our skills, our story, and everything in between. We have to push through writer’s block, being told we should get “real jobs”, having to listen to everyone we meet tell us that they have a “great” story idea, as if we don’t have our own or that we need the help.

We’re told we have to “show up” every day. We have to write when we feel like it and even when we don’t. We’re told we’re not real writers unless we do it every day. We’re told we’re not real writers unless we read. We have to get up extra early to find quiet time, or stay up late for the same reason. There are days when we’re lucky to write a sentence, and others when we go blind staring at the screen because we can’t stop the flow.

There’s panic and dread when we submit our stories. There’s a a little panic when we see a new story hitting the shelves or the screens that resembles ours. There’s a perpetual state of waiting. Waiting for inspiration, waiting for a break, waiting for results…and beyond all that, there’s hope.

There’s hope that our story will resonate with someone. That it will help them in some way. That we’ll see our name on a bookshelf or a tv/movie screen. That people will talk about our characters. That they can’t wait to find out what happens next. That they’ll see subtext we weren’t aware of. Maybe they’ll create fan art or fan fiction. Maybe they’ll ship characters we didn’t imagine together.

It’s the hopes and dreams we have for our work that keep us going, but sometimes we need a break from the pressures we place upon ourselves. We heap quite a bit upon our shoulders, and elsewhere. We can’t half ass our creativity, not if we want it to matter, not only to them but also to us.

There are times to press on, to push through those blocks and walls, and there are others to set yourself to rights. Another thing we writers need to know – the difference between them.

What a wonderful life we lead.

So keep your chin up, and do what you can to move forward. Just do your best, even if that means taking a break. No other path is as persistent as ours. No other creative pursuit, or otherwise, is expected to give 365 days of commitment, so let’s remember to be kind to ourselves.

If you have any tips about staving off burnout or how to get past it, please do share!

Happy Writing! 😉

16Jun2022

Mid-Year Goal Check

Posted in Posts by Rachael C Marek

It’s June.

It doesn’t really feel like it, as the sun has only been out a few times this year so far. By now, in Vegas I would already be complaining about the heat, longing for cooler days, and here I am on the flip side, wishing for a day above 65 degrees.

Apparently, according to long-time PNW residents, this never-ending gloom is unusual. Like, hasn’t happened in 72 years. Didn’t they something similar last summer during the heat wave? Either way, I’m so happy we could be here to experience it. ((insert eye roll))

The lack of noticeable change in the seasons almost made me forget where we are in the year. Halfway through. Time for a check in on those annual goals.

You may recall I mentioned making them more “manageable” at some point.

Yes, this coming from the woman who wanted to watch a movie a week, read two books a month, read three screenplays a month, all while working full-time, having two dogs, writing, managing an Etsy shop, a desire to cosplay, starting a business, and so much more, in addition to all the other normal life stuff.

Yeah, hi. No wonder every year I was disappointed with my progress. I was out of control.

I decided to cut back this year, and having made it to the half way point, I am able to reflect with better clarity and rationale and say with all honesty, more attainable goals are so much more beneficial to my overall well-being.

This is something I’ve had to remind myself of, a lot – goals are just things to aspire to, not necessarily achieve. It’s a way to stay accountable. They are not meant to act as a measuring stick in order to judge the merit of our character based on whether we actually accomplished everything on our list.

*By the way, that’s all me. I’m guessing at this point, all those quotes I’ve shared have done their job.

We all want to make progress. We want some way of measuring how far we’ve come. Hence the goals. But when they are wildly out of reach when you have other responsibilities, the lack of reaching them can really hit our feelings of self-worth. That is so not the point.

Things are hard enough as it is. Why torture ourselves further?

I’m happy to report that I’ve made some of my goals. This is big for me. I’m usually eyeballing December 31st with skepticism. I know it’s judging me. I still have a lot of work ahead of me, but having achieved some smaller and some larger goals, I feel a bit more confident moving forward.

And that’s all we need sometimes. A boost to our self-esteem.

Here are a few of the goals I’m happy with so far:

My screenplay, Fate(s) is done. I will not touch it again without compensation. Pop the champagne! The troublesome child is ready to go out into the world!
I completed the first draft of my fifth feature, Projection. Gotta say, I’m pretty satisfied. A rare state.
I’m polishing up the next chapter in my fanfic series to get that off my mind. I’m sure more ideas will come knocking soon enough.
I chose to only watch two movies a month instead of one a week. I’m currently sitting at 20/24. Not too shabby.
I limited my book reading challenge, and not understanding how the library hold system works, it had been a while, ended up meeting that goal early on: 17/15.

My other goals were to get a new job (check), create a new writing space (partial check), and meet with a screenwriting coach (check). This I will cover separately.

More manageable goals are really the way to go. A feeling of accomplishment can really help the whole state of being and help on the long journey of our creative path.

How are your goals shaping up this year? Let’s celebrate our accomplishments and cheer one another on!

Happy Writing!

4May2022

Quote of the Week

Posted in Posts, Quotes by Rachael C Marek

Almost 7 years ago to the day, I shared this quote. This knowledge, to some degree, makes me sad.

7 years?!

A new goal?! A new dream?!

While I absolutely agree with this quote, I am reminded that I still haven’t reached said goal from 7 years ago.

Now, while I haven’t done everything in my power to achieve my dream of becoming a professional writer, the passage of time is a harsh reminder that I have wasted a lot of it. Call back to a previous post. The time does, honestly, fly, and it flies with even greater speed the older you get. I have been spouting words of positivity and chasing your dreams all this time and simultaneously been dragging my feet.

I finally took the next step I’ve been talking about to work with a screenwriting coach. Before I speak with her directly, she has asked me to fill out a questionnaire that will save time in the “getting to know you” phase. There are some questions that are making me come to terms with my journey as a writer.

I am a procrastinator.

This is not newsworthy. I’m well aware of this problem, and even though sometimes I think I’m doing better…BAM! I discover I’m not. Hi. 7 years.

I have fear.

I’ve discussed this a time or two. Fear of the unknown. Fear of success. Fear of actually getting the thing I want because then what do I do? That’s a bad joke. But the nervous energy of the potential/wish fulfilling change is real. So many of us are comfortable with the known mundane.

I need accountability.

Because I’ve had to rely on a day job in the interim, often times that schedule takes precedence over all else. Bills have to be paid. This is a sad part of reality for all creatives before they can work full time at their passion. Beyond the job we have families and a slew of responsibilities that usually push our creative outlets to the back burner. The unsatisfying nature of some of our day jobs leave us tired and emotionally drained. Also, there’s no one to answer to at this stage.

The only one I’m letting down at this point is me.

At a day job, there’s accountability. There’s a hierarchy. A dependency. It’s what I want from my writing, to be responsible for only that.

So why this quote, you may be wondering? Given the above. Because as I now officially take the step towards accountability with a career coach, swallowing my fear and putting procrastination in the corner, I have to remind myself that age is just a number and taking this goal seriously, finally, is worth the effort.

With age comes a shift in perspective, obviously not everyone benefits from experience (i.e. the current state of things), but I know my sense of humor has changed. I find all sorts of random things fascinating thanks to exposure, and all that has affected my writing. Sometimes I think, I’ve had to wait until now to become this writer because I wasn’t ready before.

The story I’m running with started out as a fluffy romance piece, and now it has depth. Without some life experience under my belt, it never would have become what it is today. I have to remind myself of some of the quotes I’ve shared over the years, one of them being:

Trust the timing of your life.

So, no matter your age, no matter the goal, attempt the thing and who knows…maybe you’ll surprise yourself.

Best of luck! xx, Rach

8Mar2022

Year One in the PNW

Posted in Posts by Rachael C Marek

A few years ago I saw this funny skit on Portlandia about how excited the patrons of the city got when the sun finally made itself known after months of gray skies.

I thought it was an exaggeration.

What I’ve learned after one year in the PNW – it was not.

from NightyBirdo

This is now my life.

I went from living in cities with incessant sun to one where it is non-existent for nearly half the year, so I have become that giddy person when I see golden light instead of shades of gray.

Ridiculous.

When people ask if I like it here, I say not really, but that’s not exactly being fair. When we arrived from our out-of-state move, it was pouring rain. Not the best welcome. But the summer was lovely, until the heat wave with no a/c. Having grown up in Las Vegas, I can do 120+ degrees, but air conditioning is everywhere so it’s oddly bearable. *LV native tip: No leather car seats.

I have been almost perpetually cold since we arrived here.

I know it’s something I have to adjust to…because I just wasn’t prepared. I do not have a rain coat or boots, but I do have an umbrella, that has never been opened, because apparently that’s a huge faux pas here.

The lack of outdoor accessibility has led to overweight dogs, and seasonal depression. Another thing I’ve learned is an actual thing.

To counter act these negatives, the people are truly nice here. The air smells clean. Nature will practically walk right up to you. For a little while in the summer, because of the northern placement, the sun stays up until 10pm which is awesome, but as you’ll recall from my note above, it disappears almost entirely during the winter as if to taunt, “I hope you enjoyed that…you’ll see it again next year!”

Washington’s nickname is the Evergreen State. This is accurate. There is an ever present layer of green on everything, and there are so. many. trees.

There is so much to do and see. There’s Mount Rainier (which you can see from all over the state), lavender fields, whale watching, vineyards, TV and movie locations, a cute Bavarian inspired town, tons of hikes and day trips, and water at every turn. There are chocolatiers and breweries, and cool eateries to try.

There’s also history here. Something I appreciate.

Some quirks: Everyone parks in backwards here. I’ve never seen so many “Student Driver” bumper stickers. It is surprisingly expensive to live here. For the entire month of May it appears as if it’s snowing from all the tree fluff in the air. The fog is like scary movie-cut it with a knife-fog. 50 degrees feels warm. For a girl from the desert, huh?! They love their Seahawks. So much so, the fans have their own designated player number, 12. There are always tree clearing crews cutting back foliage to circumvent power outages. I passed three the other day within a mile. And we appreciate it. We once went without power for nearly 15 hours. Not fun. You hear it rains a lot here. You have this unconscious awareness that it rains a lot here. It’s more than you can imagine.

Now we know we need sort of emergency situation essentials, for any season, and for both the car and home. It’s during these unexpected times that you evaluate the necessity of certain items, or even their relevancy, like I didn’t know I’d ever need a battery operated lamp that can also charge my phone. Hm.

We resigned our lease for another year, and plan on making the most of the sights to discover what makes this place so endearing. We’ve made it though the first year, and have a better understanding of what to expect, so crossing our fingers that year two will be a more enjoyable journey.

Have you ever moved where you thought you knew what to expect, but also discovered it was not what you were prepared for? I’d love to know I’m not alone in this surprising discovery.

1Mar2022

Escapism or Research

Posted in Posts, Reviews by Rachael C Marek

We all remember during lockdown and the US presidential election, how so many of us struggled, while others flourished. There was an outpouring of creativity and community and I was in awe of what could be done when given the chance. I was not one of those people. I was in the first group.

I was not creative. I barely wrote. I couldn’t watch anything “heavy”; there were a lot of bad movies viewed. I developed anxiety.

It was a strange time.

It was the year that will go down in infamy – 2020.

We couldn’t wait for it to go away. So many of us looked to 2021 as a magic reset button.

It was not.

I was determined to make 2022 different. With the new year and new goals, I decided to stop wasting my TV viewing time on things I’ve watched a dozen times over. I would watch those “must see” movies and shows in my genre. I would read the books I “should have” read. I would read more screenplays because you know, that’s what I want to do in life.

I had a new perspective and I wanted to make an impact.

Then, when things felt like they might be getting better, ever so slightly, a megalomaniac chose that moment to make things that much worse.

It’s easy to use TV, movies, and video games as a means of escapism in a world turned on its side. It’s easy to rationalize it all as research when you’re a creative.

It’s a little column A, a little column B.

So, despite the current situation, I thought I’d share the 3 shows I’ve watched so far that I’ve enjoyed if you’re in need of a little escape (or research 😉 ). They’re all available on Netflix.

Arcane – By far the best show I’ve watched in some time. The animation is beautiful, the characters are all intriguing, and the world is unique. Considering it took 6 years to make the first season, I’m guessing it will be a long wait for season 2, but it will be worth it.
The Witcher Season 2 – I am a big fan of the third installment in the video game series – I even wrote a review about it – so I was always going to watch the show. While season 1 was a little convoluted and hard to follow if you weren’t familiar with the material, they did a great job with the second season.
Shadow and Bone – This series kept being suggested to me, and I wasn’t sure what to expect. I had not read the books, or even heard of them beforehand. I have since read the first novel. Don’t waste your time, just watch the show. It’s a magical land, actually, they don’t call it magic, and there are some fun characters, and it was better than I thought it would be.

I’ve started a few other shows and if anything else resonates, I’ll be sure to pass it along.

Do you have any shows or movies to recommend? What shouldn’t be missed?

Happy Watching!

27Jan2022

Throwback Thursday #2: The Lies We (I) Tell Ourselves (Myself)

Posted in Posts by Rachael C Marek

Writer.

It’s what I tell people I am.

Most of the time it’s true.

Even in times of writing drought, when I was embarrassed by the day job, I told people I was a writer, as if that would somehow make up for, what I considered, my professional shortcomings.

I’m not just a food server, I’m a struggling artist.

I’ll never forget the time I used an elaborate word in front of a guest and them being surprised that I knew such a word and used it properly in context. How insulting.

Saying I’m a writer is almost like a hall pass. It takes time to make it, so floundering is all just a part of the journey. Working towards that goal for a number of years is expected, but I discovered I was lying. Pretending.

Not intentionally, of course. And really only to myself.

It was a way for me to justify taking another dead end job because a “real” job would be all-consuming and take away from what I really wanted to do. It was a way to excuse the life I had found myself in. It was a way for my friends to think me brave for following my dreams after all these years.

I didn’t want it bad enough. I thought it would be easier. The story is not quite right…yet.

Those are simple lies I could tell myself, in hindsight, as to why “it” hasn’t happened yet, but they’re simply not true.

I’ve always wanted to be a writer. It seems I’ve only ever gotten in my own way.

Maybe it’s fear. Maybe it’s laziness.

Showing up for a dream is hard.

I was searching through old posts for today’s subject matter and came across so many instances of me saying I was going to “do things different this year”. I was going to try a new strategy. Set new goals. Make my mark.

It all led to this.

I’ve had this blog for 8 years now. I can count on one hand the number of times I did something different in attempt to propel my career forward. I write about staying positive, reaching for your dreams, slaying your goals and rewarding yourself for achieving them because I wanted to create a space in which I could inspire others, as well as track my progress.

Progress…ha!

Finding myself regurgitating the same words all these years later…well, let’s just say it was rather eye opening.

If my actions are any indication as to who I am, I am mostly not a writer. But it is who I want to be.

I have wasted years not writing, but I’ve never not said I wasn’t a writer. It’s a big lie I’ve told myself, and one I will not continue to perpetuate.

One of my goals for this year was to discover what aspect of my writing to work on. I thought it might be structure or pacing.

Goodness. What sort of Pandora’s box did I open?!

Apparently, my problem is follow through. I could write all day, every day, but without an actual endgame, there is nothing to propel me forward to making writing all day, every day a reality. A contest deadline isn’t enough. There has to be more. More action. More steps forward. More accountability. More solid, actual progress.

I’ve been on a mission for months now, after that lightbulb moment, and I am proud to report that I’ve finished one story, rewritten two screenplays, and am nearly halfway through writing a new one. But now it’s time to do something about it.

This post (may) hint at my self-loathing for my ability to so long not go after my dream, despite all the quotes to the contrary, but it is the kick in the pants I need to get myself off this merry-go-round. Why would you want to keep reading about my journey if I don’t have one?

I want to throw my fist in the air and say “That all changes today!”, but it physically can’t, there are steps that have to be taken, but I am taking a first step in that direction soon.

A story for another day.

What lies have you told yourself that are keeping you from achieving what you want? Let’s help one another move passed them!

xx, Rach