Another Year Already?!

About nine years ago, I had been out of work for a year, had applied for probably 75 jobs or more (I used to remember the exact number) to which I only received two responses, and found myself terribly depressed (and not writing).

Finally The Sis encouraged me to just focus on my writing and build up my career, she would take care of the rest. It was a hard pill to swallow, letting my much younger sister carry the burden of our expenses, but I was no closer to getting a job, and at least I could write.

I had been reading articles for years, knew what I needed to have in my portfolio, and so basically, I started from square one. I wanted to create a pseudonym, create a new identity for the writer side of me, and actually started creating social media handles and a blog under the name Caedan Marek. I liked the name (and spelling of) Aedan, but so did everyone else, and cadence is the flow of sounds, and I’m a writer, hence the combination and eventual conclusion to the first name.

After some time, I realized it didn’t work. At least not for me at that moment. I didn’t want to be in meetings or what-have-you and not hear my given name. My real name is Rachael. Hi! But I would keep the last name. It held special meaning to me and I had decided upon it pretty quickly. I took it from a character in Michael Crichton’s book, Timeline. When I read it, I sort of fell in love with him, Andre Marek. I identified with him. And then stole his name.

If you’ve been with me for a while, you know how I’ve struggled from time to time with my writing here and for the career I desire. Life often gets in the way of the pursuit of a dream only we can see.

So it’s now been 8 years. 8 years?! ((sigh)) I’m not sure if I should be proud or you know, not.

Reflecting on all these years of blogging, my first full year, 2014 was my most productive and most interacted with year. 2015 and 2016 were also pretty good, but then I took a sharp decline in 2017. That’s when I started working at the country club, and I was generally exhausted all the time. 2018 was worse, and then got slightly better in 2019. All while still at the club. Ugh. That place was like an energy sucking vampire. We all know what 2020 was like, and I’m already doing better this year, so there’s that.

Pinterest is my biggest referrer. Ah, thanks Pinterest! You know I love you too! And the writing prompts are my most often viewed posts. I’m glad they’re making themselves useful.

There have been a lot of things I’ve learned and discovered since I started blogging, and I have to thank The Sis for her encouragement and support all these years. We all need someone in our corner, and it is because of her that I will succeed. I felt this shift in my mentality recently. I must be more dedicated to my career goal, as it would basically be an insult to her belief in me otherwise.

So, Happy Anniversary to A Writer’s Discrepant Memoirs & Other Tales! And a big ‘Thank You’ to all of you for your continued support! This has been a place of refuge, where I can geek out, and keep track of my progress, and hopefully, in the very near future, it will be a place I will share the highs and lows on the actual journey to reaching my big dream. Wish me luck! ūüėČ

xx, Rach

A Reason to Celebrate

I feel like I’m in mourning.

Honestly. I feel this sense of sadness at the completion of the first draft of the story I’ve been working on. While I continued to make comments that I was excited to be nearing the end, so I could work on other projects, when I finished writing a few days ago, I didn’t feel that moment of bliss at its conclusion – you know the one – instead, I felt sad.

I’ve been lethargic and had this sort of blah feeling ever since.

I could feel myself dragging my feet a bit a couple of weeks ago, my pace slowing as I knew the end was nigh. It meant I would have to leave the comfort of that world I was so thoroughly enjoying, and I would have to dive into something different and acclimate to the change.

Yes, there are still a few scenes to be fleshed out, and of course, a rewrite or two, but that first draft is you telling yourself the story. You use your heart and feel the emotions, you let the characters be who they want to be. It’s play time. The subsequent work is much different. You use your head and logic, and have to be merciless in cutting away the fluff.

Art in any form is a strange endeavor. We get emotionally tied to our work and then have to look at it as though it’s some sort of creature to be wary of. It’s taken on a life of its own and it’s up to us to rear it. We have to split our creative personality to achieve a better end result. It’s like tough love.

So I’m a mixture of emotion at the moment. I do feel the pride that comes with finishing something, it truly is a reason to celebrate, and I will, in maybe another day or two. This was advice I came upon years ago. When you complete a goal, do something to mark the occasion. Have a celebratory drink, splurge a little, give yourself a pat on the back in whatever form that may take.

And if you’re sad about its end, feel that too.

Writing is one of those outlets that so many people think they can do. How many of us have heard people say that they “have a great story idea” or that they “want to try their hand at it”? As if it were so easy because they can string two words together. Now how many people actually do it?

Be proud of your accomplishments. We’re doing something that makes us happy, often times at the expense of sleep or some other enjoyable thing, and while sometimes maddening, I know that most writers wouldn’t have it any other way. It’s why we keep at it. We can’t help it. It’s who we are. And I know for myself, it was what made me excited to get up in the morning these last few months. Something I never thought to say.

So, it’s decided. Today will be my last day of wallowing. It’s literally time to turn the page on a new adventure.

How do you mark the end of a project? Do you celebrate or mourn? A little bit of both? Commiserate with me. And Happy Writing! ūüėČ

Quote of the Week

July 2nd was the halfway point of the year, so I thought it would be a good time to reflect on where we are with our goals.

I have set goals for myself the last few years because somehow, one time, the whole year had passed and I hadn’t read a single book or watched more than half a dozen films. Who knows what that meant for my writing…

What happened that year?!

When I came to that realization, I started to create a list of goals I wanted to accomplish each year. Call them goals or resolutions or even part of your “to do list”, but without some sort of structure, a clear path to follow, it’s easy to allow them to just remain an idea, a figment, a wish.

Goals do not have to be secured at the beginning of the year, we can create a new one anytime. We don’t have to wait for November to power through a writing challenge. Every day is a chance to start. Each day is an opportunity to get a little bit closer to where we want to be.

So whatever goals you set for yourself at the beginning of the year, check in on your progress. What adjustments need to be made? If you want to create a new goal for yourself and/or your work, do it. Make a step-by-step list of how you can and will accomplish this task. What do you need to do? Who can help you? What is a realistic time frame? Are there tools that would better help you if you had them available? Set a deadline for yourself, or find an external one, like a contest entry that will keep you on track. What steps will bring you closer to achieving your dream?

Write it all down. Make it visual. Sometimes seeing a large goal is overwhelming because there is a vagueness in how you might get from A to Z, but when it’s broken down into more manageable steps, the objective doesn’t seem so unattainable. Also, small steps toward the larger goal can help maintain your positivity and momentum as you see yourself checking off those tasks.

I am in no way always successful, but I’ve come to the conclusion that by at least acknowledging the things I’d like to accomplish, it gives me something to strive towards, even if I sometimes fail.

I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors, and if you ever need a cheerleader for a bit of encouragement, you know where to find me. ūüėČ

2021 Resolutions

Premium Vector | 2021 neon sign, bright signboard.

This is the year I’m going to make things happen. We strike a pose and make a fist to emphasize the point.

How many times have we said that?

Looking at a new year in terms of making leaps and bounds towards our goals sounds good, in theory, but in actuality, imagining a whole year to accomplish great things is daunting. 12 months is a big chunk of time. Even though it passes in a blink of an eye. Without periodic check-ins, thinking we have so much time to do everything we want to do generally has the opposite effect and we end up starting grand, petering out, only to approach December in a sort of panic that we didn’t accomplish all we had hoped.

Then the subsequent self admonishment, pity, anger, and false assurances that we’ll do better “next year” begins.

We need to not think about our goals in relationship to the whole year. Instead we need to create more manageable terms, such as what can we accomplish in the next 3 months? After 3 months, we should evaluate, reassess, adjust and move forward for the following 3 months and so on.

By setting short term goals, we can trick our minds into focusing on the task at hand (well, that’s my hope anyway). I do better when I know there’s an external deadline to meet. It’s hard set, not just some self deluded, fanciful idea that I will complete my screenplay without an outside driving force in the next few months – especially when I have an impending move and all that goes with it on the horizon…((panic mode)) – without that deadline, the pressure, I know I will slack off a bit.

And this is where knowing how we best operate is key. In what environment do you best work? At what time? Do you constantly meet your goals or do you play fast and loose? How do you best keep yourself accountable?

I said I would share my resolutions and I will. Every 3 months. I’m looking at these first 3 months skeptically because of the move but it is my hope ((crosses fingers)) that I will finally, once and for all, no-more-rewriting-unless-paid-to-do-so, complete my screenplay Fate(s). I only have the 3rd act to finish and I have it mostly worked out now.

I have other writing resolutions and personal ones too but this year I’m trying my best to temper my ambitions. I always want to do so much, thinking a whole year is plenty of time…I have learned I am wrong.

So thinking on our goals for 2021, I offer you the following three questions I found in an article I read in 2019. I’ve been contemplating them and thought I would share them as part of my resolution post because while goal setting is a fine endeavor, if we don’t want to feel disappointed in our yearly resolutions, maybe we should reevaluate how we define success, for ourselves.

  1. What needs to happen by the end of the year to make it great?
  2. What needs to happen/be accomplished to feel successful?
  3. What will give you validation?

And finally, to end on a note of encouragement, because it doesn’t feel that overwhelming, a word from C. Robert Cargill, a writer I follow on Twitter:

There are 261 working days in 2021. If you write just 1 page every work day, taking holidays and weekends off, you can write at least 2 scripts or 1 novel in 2021. If you write just 2 pages every work day, you can write 5 scripts or 2 novels in 2021.

I hope we all move forward to accomplishing our goals this year. If you’d like to be part of an accountability group or know of one we can all join, please share. I’m thinking of creating something after we settle from the move – a goal for the 2nd quarter.

Happy Writing!

The Last Quote of 2020

35 Best Inspirational Quotes About The New Year That Prove 2019 Is Going To Be Your Best Year Yet | YourTango

I always say that I don’t like to make resolutions; that a goal can be set at any time. This is probably because I was like most people who fell off the wagon a couple of months into whatever resolution they had set for themselves. The keyword in that sentence is “was”. I was like that, and yes, I still have my moments, but I’m getting better…well, I try.

A few years ago I realized I hadn’t read a single book all year. Not one. I also realized I hadn’t watched a movie besides those in the MCU or Star Wars that were in theaters that year. What’s that then, maybe three movies? And I want to be a writer – of movies. Sheesh.

Upon this discovery I set two goals/resolutions for the following year: read more and watch more. I started my “one-movie-a-week challenge” which means 52 new movies a year and I use Goodreads to set a reading goal and track my progress. I usually have a few other things I want to do – I still want to learn to sew – and that’s where I tend to fall short. I need to find or create a goal tracker for these other things I’d like to accomplish.

With the longest year ever nearly behind us, there’s a big shining light at the end of the tunnel. If this year has taught us anything it’s that we’re resilient, that time truly is precious, and that we should find and do what makes us happy. I did a lot of soul searching this year and have an idea of the life I’d like to build, and now look to the horizon to make that possible.

So next week I’m going to share my resolutions for 2021 (yep, I’m calling them by their name). And it is my hope that by putting them out into the world, I’ll hold myself accountable. I’ve been thinking that it might be a good idea to create an “accountability team”. If you’d like to be a part of it, I’m going to put out the call, and we’ll work together to follow through on those goals. I hope you’ll join me.

And here’s to 2021. May you bring with you good things.

Welcome to 2020

20202Happy New Year, friends!

Can you believe it? ¬†Not only has another year ended, but we’re now in a new decade. ¬†I’m still of the mindset that the 90s were the last decade because to think otherwise is just ridiculous. ¬†How could it be, now, 20+ years ago?!

I tend to bring in the new year doing the one thing I hope to be doing the rest of it, writing, but I’ll come clean, I haven’t been able to write since quitting my job. ¬†I, instead chose to spend it with one of my favorite people, Jane Austen. ¬†I completed my “One New Movie-a-Week” Challenge last week with Rise of the Skywalker, but I thought it might be a nice motivator to watch a movie, a world I want to be a part of, instead. ¬†I had not seen the film Love and Friendship, based on the novella, Lady Susan,¬†and while I’ll have more to say on it in my next post about my movie challenge, it got me thinking about my own writing. ¬†So at least there’s that.

I nearly finished my Goodreads reading challenge of 12 books, a despicably low number, I know. ¬†I kept seeing these posts that if you want to be a writer and don’t make the time to read you can’t really be a writer. ¬†I was a much better reader a few years ago when my schedule permitted me to do things in a particular order. ¬†Now, I’m trying to implement that old schedule into my new daily routine. ¬†When I realized the end of the year was nigh and I wasn’t going to make my goal, I had to reevaluate a few things.

In that reevaluation was the thought that maybe I had set myself up for failure by expecting too much of myself throughout the year. ¬†I already knew the job was not allowing me to accomplish much, so achieving some of those goals was always going to be difficult, if not impossible. ¬†While I did complete a few of the tasks I had set out to do, like attending my first screenwriter’s conference, others, like the reading challenge, fell by the wayside. ¬†How could I possibly expect so much when days, weeks, and even months passed without a glance towards my passions?

I have to look at this year’s goal setting a bit differently. ¬†Remember, I don’t like resolutions, and I don’t think January 1st is a magic reset button, but it is an unavoidable marker for moving forward and starting anew. ¬†The outside world has dates and seasons for meeting goals, and a new year puts much of that into perspective. ¬†But there are things that I continue to carry over each year that I want to do that, while time consuming, are still worthy goals to pursue. ¬†It’s just going to take some patience and clever maneuvering, and not be at the forefront while more pressing matters are attended to.

What do you want to accomplish this year?  How will you set out to ensure you reach that goal?

set and reach goal concept

Here’s one of my favorite goal setting images for inspiration. ¬†Now let’s go crush 2020!

Quote Monday

Quote Mondays are back!

My days of slack are over.  My two-week self-imposed vacation must come to an end and the reason for said vacation must begin Рfollowing my dream.  Mondays are a great day to start a new thing.

So let my future commence today!

Don't downgrade your dream

What do you want to accomplish today?

Happy Writing!

Writer’s Slump

I’ve been quiet…for a while. Initially it was because I was focused on my work. My real work. I’m still disconnected from the day job since the incident back in February, so at least there’s that. It still takes up a lot of time and energy, just the same. But then a series of mental hits soon followed and I lost my mojo. I’m second guessing myself. I don’t write, even when I want to. I don’t know how to fix some of my story issues, I’m feeling depressed, and I’m just not writing.

I leave for the Austin Film Festival in the wee hours of the morning and I had this huge laid out plan for how I was going to be prepared for it. I was excited and ready to take on the challenge, and then, in the blink of an eye, the passion disappeared. No matter how many quotes about being positive and goal oriented, fearless and creative I read or post, nothing is cracking this current mood.

Yes, yes, I know that failure is a part of the process, but I feel like I’ve been struggling for a long time, when I know, in reality, with all the spurts of inactivity, it’s only been a few years that I’ve been actively pursuing a career. This year’s screenwriting competition season offered me nothing. With only one more competition awaiting announcement, I sort of feel like… I wasted a lot of money. I love the story I submitted, and it’s not to say that someone else won’t feel the same way I do about it in the future, but the lack of upward mobility was less than encouraging.

I don’t know why I want to rant about this. I’m guessing that sometimes we all feel like this, and maybe it would be helpful for other struggling writers to realize they’re not alone. We all hit walls along this creative path, but if it’s truly what we want to do, then I guess, after some moping, we’ll get off our asses and get back to it.

At least that’s what I’m telling myself.

Because I only have tonight to shift this mentality and take advantage of this huge step I’m taking. And even though it may not sound like I’m excited, I am, deep down, and I’m sure everything will change once I board that plane and the realization hits of what it is I’m going to do.

I’m going to my first screenwriter’s conference!

I plan to discuss the conference day by day and hopefully impart some of the wisdom and helpful tips I learn. I’m hoping to get my mojo back, be inspired, and feel empowered, as well as make some writer friends who understand this journey.

So before that happens, what do you do when you hit a writer’s slump?

Quote Monday

InspireLast week I wrote an entire blog post after learning that my pilot had not advanced in the second contest I had entered.  I was sad and the overall tone was not the happy-stay positive-reach for your dreams-vibe I try to maintain here.

So I didn’t post it.

Rejection, in any form, is tough to take. ¬†People say all sorts of things to put a positive spin on the situation, but when it comes down to it, rejection plain ol’ sucks.

I was already struggling with the third act of one screenplay, and I’ve put a lot of pressure on myself to get everything in order for the conference in October, so this news struck a blow. ¬†I was down for the rest of the day. ¬†But that’s part of the process. ¬†You take the hit, get back up, and show ’em.

It’s hard when so much is in our hands as writers, and so much that isn’t.

It’s not like I didn’t know this going in, but it doesn’t make it any less frustrating. ¬†The whisper of doubt that sneaks its way in about the possibility that no one will ever like what I write and I never become a professional screenwriter grows louder with each rejection, but then I think of the people that were once just like me.

Every writer ever.

So no, I’m not giving up. ¬†On the contrary. ¬†I’m just getting started. ¬†So here is the “stay positive-reach for your dreams” tip of the day:

Wear that rejection like a badge of honor because at least it shows that your striving towards your goals.  How many people do you know that are unwilling to even try?

Good Luck and Happy Writing!