Fear of Success

QuestionMarksI’m certain I’ve talked about this subject in the past – the idea that even if our lives are chaotic and unsatisfying, we’re comfortable with what’s familiar, what we know.  Sometimes while striving towards a goal, the unknown can be cause for fear, even if subconsciously.

How do I know this?

I’m pretty sure I created an act of self-sabotage this week, of course without any thought.

I wrote an original TV pilot to add to my portfolio, and I have to say, I’m proud of it.  It took some time to get everything in order, it’s sci-fi with aliens and distant worlds, etc. but when I got into it, I had tons of ideas and I really wanted to spend more time with these characters.

Writing the pilot is among the most satisfying writing I’ve done.  I had a clear image in my head and I wrote it.  I made minor adjustments, but honestly, within five drafts I felt it was ready to be seen.

I sent it to my readers, got positive feedback, and then found a contest to submit it to.  I wasn’t looking for any contests, it was my plan to get everything in order for the beginning of the year, but there was a pilot launch contest from Screencraft and the deadline was fast approaching.

So, why not?!

The Sis went through the script with a fine tooth comb and found all my little grammatical errors and one thing she thought needed changing – the name of a fairly inconsequential character.  Agent Six as he had been called, reminded her of something, and it was my goal to not have anything (names, places, expletives) sound too similar to those things I had been inspired by.  If that makes sense.

I had named him Six in honor of my favorite Cylon, but upon a search, Agent Six is a pretty big character on a current running TV series, so I felt it should be changed.  I didn’t have a lot of time to make the change and I got sidetracked during the process…I’m sure you can guess what happened.

I hit submit, got ready for work, and an hour later on my drive it hit me – I hadn’t caught them all.

The Beastie Boys song “Sabotage” has been playing on repeat in my head for days now. (The fan made Rogue One trailer hasn’t helped matters.)

Was this an act of self-sabotage?  Am I afraid of getting what I want?  For all my talk about going after your dreams, am I just putting on a façade?

I am so angry with myself, still.  Yes, it’s a small error, but when you’re hoping to be a professional, the best, most perfect representation of your work should go out into the world.  Does this error deter from the story?  No.  It’s near the end and takes up a fraction of the page, but it’s there, and I know it, and I know they’ll see it.

Sigh.

And now a new deadline lingers on the horizon, and in the back of my mind I have to wonder, am I capable of setting myself up again?  I truly hope not.

I’m not sure how to spin this to be helpful, except maybe to say, “make sure you have the time and focus to rewrite your work.”  Deadlines are great motivators, but let me be an example of what not to do.  Don’t wait until the last minute.  Don’t worry about something inconsequential – it can be changed later if there’s concern.  Plan ahead.  And, I suppose, this quote sums it up perfectly:

Don't be too hard on yourself

Wishing you all the very best in your endeavors!

Writing Prompt #90

I am totally fascinated by this image from Bryan Olson:

Space:Portal

A very particular idea came to mind when I saw this, and because I’ve been lackadaisical in my flash fiction writing, I’m definitely going to challenge myself to write something about this.

Will you join me?

Happy Writing!

Quote Monday

Hi everyone!  I’m back after a crazy week of Gishwhes, and a week of recovery.

I like to do a recap of the week’s events, and as you may have noticed the odd post about Miss Jean Louis, an item for this year’s hunt, it tends to get a bit weird and challenging. Because my memory is so fragmented, this blog has become a resource for me to keep track of things, so I’ll share Team Falkor’s antics later this week.

As for today, it’s time to get back to routine and progress!

CreativityIsContagious

In light of the creativity that abounds during Gish week, and the post I wrote just a few days before it started about how I was feeling burnt out, I am now seeking out alternative means for creativity.  I’m looking to surround myself with people who are passionate and creative, because the above quote is true.

I have found myself inspired by other’s creativity, and I think that is a wonderful side effect to the creative life.  So let’s be a creative force and make beautiful things!

Writing Prompt #89

I was at a bit of a loss as to which image to share for a Writing Prompt today.  I scrolled through hundreds of images, not finding myself drawn to any one picture in particular.

And then I saw this:

Crowd

I’m not sure what exactly is drawing me to this image, but I found myself scanning the crowd…

What do you think?  Are you inspired to join me in this week’s Writing Prompt Challenge?

Happy Writing!

*Art by Craig Mullins

Quote Monday

On my days off, I had planned to write a couple of blog posts, but instead I did some cleaning, I applied for yet more jobs, started a rewrite, and did lots of reading.  Lots and lots of reading.

It was nice to give over half a day to the enjoyment of a good book.  I haven’t done that in a while.  So my apologies for a lack of interesting things this past week.  I’ll do my best to make up for it!

I saw this quote and felt it was apropos, and yet, I do not regret my time invested in reading.  It’s really research for a writer. 😉  I do sometimes find myself wasting time and energy on things I know I shouldn’t, so this is a helpful reminder:

Price

Have a great week everyone!  Keep striving towards those goals!

Writing Prompt #88

I’m a romantic at heart.  Despite what I may say randomly in other posts, I do love a happy ending, and it’s a big part of what I write.  There’s enough negative in the world.  Not wishing my stories to only be filled with fluff, there’s usually something else going on.

My Dragon Age fanfic, on the other hand, is pure fluff.  It didn’t start off that way, but because I’m having so much fun writing it, it gets the “I can do whatever I want” treatment.  And I’ve been writing a lot of it lately, so I sort of giggled when I saw this, and decided it’s the perfect Prompt to help me escape my current state of mind:

NoTime4Romance

What do you think?  Feel inspired to join me in this week’s challenge?

Happy Writing!

Quote Monday

When I started this blog, I wanted to have a clear focus as to what I wanted it to be.  I wanted to share my journey towards becoming a professional writer, I wanted to help other writers find inspiration and useful advice, and I wanted to share a few of the things I get excited about…you know, my geek side.

I did not want this to be a platform to share political, societal, or religious ideology.  I may be frustrated at the state of things, but I always want this to be a place for creatives to escape to, so to speak, a place of positivity and encouragement for the creative path we have been called to follow.

As writers, we hold a great deal of power, and it is with that voice we can do great things!  Use them wisely. 😉

*It is in light of everything, events in my own life and those surrounding us (and in spite of my earlier comments), that this rang true:

Persevere

I wish you all the very best in both your “real” life and creative one.

xx, Rach

*Updated multiple times because, despite being a writer, I could not find the right words to express my feelings correctly…

Writing Prompt #87

I need to get back to writing some flash fiction myself.  So if you think it’s too late to write a piece based on something you’ve seen here before…think again.

Come write with me!

Here’s this week’s Writing Prompt:

UnderTheSea

I look forward to seeing your creations!

Happy Writing!

Why Are Series Endings So Hard to Get Right?

HappyilyEverAfterThis post is in regards to shows that know they’re coming to a close, not shows that are cancelled mid-season or not renewed thereby leaving us with a wonderful cliffhanger to ponder for the rest of eternity, or dozens of unanswered questions that will haunt us on our death beds.

After watching the series finale of Dexter, way back in 2014, I wrote a rant.  You can read it here in its entirety, but what it boiled down to was giving the audience a “satisfying” ending while staying true to the characters.

You may be wondering why I’m on another rant.  I’ve finished a few shows recently, all terrible endings, and it got me wondering:

“Why can’t I get a satisfying end?”

*Be forewarned, there will be spoilers ahead for shows Dexter, True Blood, and Lost Girl!  

Let’s take a look at Dexter.

This one still bothers me, years later.  After some time recollecting on Dexter as a character, I don’t think his character arc found justice in the end.  Dexter was an amazing character to watch grow into a fully realized human – something he didn’t think he was capable of.  After all that time invested, on both sides, to leave him on his own in some podunk town without his family, no less?  Nope.  Wrong.

What would have made a satisfying ending for a serial killer?  Well, clearly there’s a moral gray area here.  Dexter, generally, killed people according to his code, does that mean he should walk free?  Not exactly, but it’s a show.  We watch it for entertainment value, not reality.  I wanted to see him reunite with his son and the woman he loved.  Simple as that.

Then there was True Blood.

True Blood ended in 2014 and I was an avid viewer of the show.  About three episodes into the final season, they killed a character off in such a way, I was turned off completely from finishing the show.  Two years later, finally having access to HBO again, The Sis and I decided to finish it.

What a let down.

From episode one on, Sookie is generally at the center of whatever conflict is happening, but they wrapped the show up in a nice little bow as if nothing bad would ever happen again.  We’ve had 7 seasons of crazy, people.  So what, it was like, they’ve done there time and have earned their peaceful Thanksgiving dinner?  Please.

They killed off a main character, they let another character revert to his old ways, and then, to top it all off, they gave Sookie that normal life everyone thought she deserved – pregnant by a faceless human husband.  She never dated a human in the entirety of the show because (I want to shout) she can hear their thoughts.

So what would have been a more satisfying ending, you might wonder?  Well, first of all, they should have listened to their characters.  Don’t send them on these unique journeys, only to put them right back at the beginning.  We didn’t hit the refresh button.  What I wanted, was to see these characters 20 years down the road.  It’s a vampire show.  There’s longevity involved.

Finally, there’s Lost Girl.

This Canadian import had a unique premise, and although I felt there was so much more they could’ve done with the show, it was a fun watch.  The show’s premise was the all-encompassing world of fae, centering on the character of Bo, a succubus, who uses her power to help human and fae alike as a sort of detective/champion.  The show was episodic, but had an overall theme each season.

After multiple seasons with hints to her power, we were treated to about 5 mins in the series finale of her going nuclear, but not quite all the way, and then they wrap it up a short time in the future.

Another let down.

As the fae on the show live for hundreds, if not thousands, of years, I would’ve really liked to see these characters in the future, not just hinting at an old foe just recently beaten.  Bo was in love with two people on the show, Lauren, a human, and Dyson, a shifter.  Dyson’s character could love others, but could only truly give his heart to one person, and he chose Bo.  Bo chose Lauren in the end.  As human lives are relatively short in comparison, I would’ve liked to have seen a reunion of Bo and Dyson in the future.  He was a wonderful character, and I feel he should’ve received his happily ever after too.

I’m not looking for just “happily ever afters”, but I am looking for satisfying endings.  As TV shows go, I understand there are multiple writers and that stories progress in different ways as seasons continue, but in these examples, I’m not sure they did right by their characters.

What do you think?  Did you like any of these endings?  What other shows annoyed you with their finales?  Which shows ended well?

I’ve been thinking about this in regards to my own original series I’ve been working on, wondering what would be the most satisfying finale.  I may not be in control of that in the end, and that sort of makes me nervous, but it doesn’t mean I can’t hope for the best.  I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Writing Prompt #86

While I was on hiatus, I gained some new followers.

Hi!  Welcome!  And thank you for joining me!

On Wednesdays, I like to post Writing Prompts.  I try to find images or phrases that will inspire us in our current works or help us break from routine and write something different.  Hopefully you’ll find inspiration and be willing to share what you create.

In yesterday’s post I talked about getting my portfolio together, which includes completing my sci-fi/spy screenplay, Projection.  I’ve had a lot of ideas for it, and trying to streamline them left me a little overwhelmed at one point.  As I prepare to conquer this story (Yes, I shall overcome!), I found this intriguing image:

FallingOrFlying

Are you inspired?

Happy Writing!

*Image from the video game, Infamous Second Son by Sucker Punch Productions for the PS4.