What is that saying about best laid plans?
Oh, yes. They often go awry. And so went the month of September.
A seemingly simple change to my work schedule for the entire month put a huge crimp in my plans. I wrote very little, and the longing I feel to be creative and get lost in my imaginary worlds is palpable, like an ache in the center of my being. This is an oddly nice reminder of the fact that I truly have found my calling. That being said, I didn’t come remotely close to finishing my planned rewrite, I ignored my blog almost completely (Sorry, everyone!), and even the fanfic got the cold shoulder and I’m right in the middle of the juiciest bit.
Not to mention a slew of other things that got pushed to the wayside. A whole month passed by and I have so very little to show for it. Even the change in the work schedule offered little result.
And finally, amidst the monotony, I received word that my pilot was not advancing in the first contest I submitted it to. I swear, if that amateur hour mistake cost me moving forward…
Sometimes I can’t help feeling as if I’m swimming against the current. There’s a whole lot of energy being expelled with little in the way of development, and I’m kind of at a loss of what decision I can make in order to achieve a more promising outcome. I wonder from time to time how many hours I’ve wasted looking for another job I don’t really want instead of investing that time in the work I actually want to do. I take that back. I really don’t want to know that number.
It’s that kind of thought that compels me to write wherever and whenever I can. Every little step helps, right? Tuesday night, instead of being compelled to do “busy work” after the one table I had (yes, you read that correctly – one), I wrote. I actually sat down at this tucked away little table and wrote. It was fan fiction, because that is the only thing I seem to be able to concentrate on at work, but I wrote…and I wrote a lot of it.
It felt good. I’ve missed it. And it was the nudge and spark of creativity I needed.
Can you believe there are only three months left to the year? Those goals I set for myself are drawing ever closer, and if I want to keep the promises I’ve made to myself, I have to get crackin’. The comforting thing about goal setting is that they can be adjusted to fit your needs/time table. There were a couple of deadlines I was hoping to make, but my overall goal of having my portfolio ready for the new year is still attainable. ((Crosses fingers))
Okay. Now that I’ve reflected on the nonsense that was September, it’s time to look forward to October and what the rest of the year has in store. With the holidays fast approaching and the time sucking that inevitably happens, we’ll have to be even more diligent with the time we have.
Even this big setback had a silver lining – I know I won’t be satisfied with doing anything else.
I’m open to suggestions for how I may best move forward and would love to hear what your goals are for the rest of the year.
Wishing you all the best in your creative endeavors!